Monday, June 22, 2015

Grooming in The Office

This morning was like any other morning. I dropped my purse off in my cube, grabbed my coffee, and settled into my chair to start a new day. But as I was waiting for the updates on my computer to finish installing, I heard the unmistakable sound of somebody clipping his fingernails.

I'm not sure if this is just a personal pet peeve, but I don't understand how somebody who had the WHOLE WEEKEND to clip his nails in the privacy of his own home gets around to Monday morning in a cube farm and decides that this is finally the perfect time for nail clipping. And clearly there was some level of premeditation, because he brought the nail clippers with him to work. What happens if one of those nails comes flipping over the cube wall and splashes into my coffee like a small child doing a belly flop off of the high dive? 

Per Murphy's Law, this is bound to happen sometime

Unless you work in a salon, I feel like you should at least excuse yourself to the bathroom if you want to do any personal grooming. I typically go to the bathroom even if I am going to engage in much quieter grooming, like fixing my makeup after I thoughtlessly rub my eyes in exasperation that somebody is clipping his nails at work before 8 am.

I'm not sure about men's bathrooms, but I know that a few of the organizations I've been at actually have places for you to leave products like nail clippers, hair brushes, or whatever so you don't have to carry them in and out all the time. And there is nowhere to leave your stuff, you can always palm those nail clippers like a tampon and smuggle them in (yeah, that was an old school reference, bet you weren't expecting that!).

What I'm trying to say is: where there is a will there is a way. And if you are confused about what activities should be restricted to the bathroom at work or at home (not your cube), I've compiled this handy list:

  • Relieve your bladder (I hope that was obvious to everyone, but just in case)
  • Brush your hair
  • Floss your teeth
  • Clip your fingernails 
  • Apply makeup
  • Apply skin treatment creams (aka acne medication)
  • Re-applying deodorant
  • Practice Twerking
Do you have any other pet peeves of things people shouldn't be doing in their cubes?

Cheers, 

Vanessa

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